CONVERSATION WITH THE BOY V

The boy is walking away
Shoulders held high and rigid
Not looking at his feet
As I do on this rocky shore
He still walks slowly
As if stalking the fear we have addressed
With our halting words
His back is to me, unspeaking
Now that we have had our say
And said nothing
And everything

Even bad choices are healthy
I call to him
It is the wrong thing to say
He walks faster
Why can I never get it right?, I lament
To my aching bones

There is still time to change, I call to him
The rounded stones under my feet
Are slippery with the tears of angels
The boy stops and glares at me
Not for you, old man, he taunts
How many times have you tried that dance
And fallen over your feet?

I push to close the gap
I will never leave you, I cry
He is farther and farther away
And I will never leave you, the boy replies
It is our Hell
He turns and walks, dwindling

I forgive you, I shout after him
The boy’s rigid shoulders drop
As if at the end of a sigh
I don’t, he replies
His voice is a wisp of sadness
As he retreats into the vanishing light

I watch him go
Knowing he will never leave
Knowing he will always hurt
Knowing his gift is a shroud of doubt
I feel it settle on me
And try to shrug it off
The boy is gone
There is nowhere else to walk
I forgive you, I whisper
Into the darkness
I forgive you